4 Reasons We Don’t Reach Our Goals


Why don’t we reach our goals? 

In my experience, the number one reason we don’t reach our goals is that we don’t Take Action.  We have a burning desire to lose weight, feel better, build a business, etc. but never put the rubber to the road.  Why is that?  Why do we seem to set ourselves up for failure?  I’ve found there are typically 4 big hurdles in our way.  

These are the Top 4 Reasons We Don’t Take Action:

1) Comfort

We construct our lives to be comfortable.  We purposefully don’t want to experience discomfort and spend a lot of time, money, and energy on the comfortable things in life. However, when we are trying to grow, change, or reach for a goal, comfort is the enemy.  We can’t remain comfortable and achieve something new – something outside our comfort zone!  So, “pain” is an essential component to growth and striving for a new goal.  Pain is a powerful motivator to start.  “I’m sick of being this lazy.”  “I can’t stand my job/salary.”  “I’m tired of being out of shape.”  These are pain-induced motivators.  

After the initial pain motivator however, is a more powerful motivator.  Progress.  Progress is the ultimate motivator.  When you are seeing results – even small results – the motivation to keep going is strong!  Progress is the powerful, long term motivator.  When you can see that the actions you’re making are moving you in the right direction you will keep taking action. 

So if you have a goal and need to take action, you need some sort of pain.  Put yourself in an uncomfortable situation.  Do something that scares you.  The hardest part is taking the first steps!  That progress will propel you forward! 

2) Distractions

Seems obvious, right?  If you don’t know by now, your phone is a distraction. (You’re probably reading this on your phone right now, distracted from something else you could be doing.)  Not only is our phone a distraction, almost everything else distracts us from the top priorities in our lives.  Binge watching a season.  Doing “busy” work.  Too many work commitments. The list is never ending.  At some point, we’ve decided that trying to do as much as possible and consume as much as possible is healthy, and socially acceptable.  To really achieve goals of any significance, we must slow down.  Stop consuming so much.  Quit saying “Yes” to everything and start saying “NO.”   Replace the quantity of what you’re doing with quality tasks.  

The key to removing all this noise from your life is having a plan.  Every day, every week, must have a plan.  If you’re free-styling it day by day, you are setting yourself up for failure.  There isn’t a single successful person that wakes up and just “wings it”.  You must have a plan for each day and each week.  It just has to be done! 

3) Excuses

We’re all guilty here too.  With so many priorities and many of them conflicting, we come up with excuses why we have to put one priority in front of the other.  Do you need examples?  Ok.   “I travel for work, so I don’t have time to work out.”  “I’m a parent, and eating healthy is hard.”  “My schedule is too busy to work on personal growth.”  “I work at McDonald’s so I can’t eat healthy.”  Alright, I’ll stop there.  Excuses are everywhere at all times!  And sadly, these excuses beat us up.  We feel so conflicted and torn internally that we are wore out; defeated.   

How do we get out of that rut and break the madness?  Accountability.  Someone that we trust to hold us accountable.  A mentor, coach, co-worker, etc.  Close family members can be helpful as well, but not always.  Choosing the right people to hold you accountable is needed to make the whole thing work.  If you go out and party with your best friends, they probably shouldn’t be your accountability partner to going to the gym.  Make sense?  Find the right people and hold each other accountable!

4)  Confusion and Uncertainty

These two will lead to not taking action also.  If you have so many ideas and distractions in your head that you can’t formulate a plan, you need to get the ideas out on paper and sort it out.  Being confused like this is just stirring the pot of soup and never pouring it out to eat.  You’ve got to get those ideas out of your head to make them meaningful!  

Similarly, if you have uncertainty or questions swirling in your brain, you’ll never take the action you need to succeed.   Doing some research and finding successful people to emulate can be very helpful.  Find people who have achieved the things you want to achieve, and copy them.  I’m not talking about “internet people” and articles written by famous people.  Find actual humans that you can meet with and find out what they’ve done to make them successful.  Want to be a good parent?  Find some good parents.  Want to lose weight?  Go to the gym and find someone who’s done it.  Want to build a business?  Find someone in the industry and introduce yourself.  

If you feel stuck and have been unable to take action on your goals, these suggestions might feel overwhelming.  Where do I start?  How can I get it all done?  How can I make so many changes?  It’s true, there is a lot that needs to be done.  If you need help with the first step, do this first:  Write down all your ideas.  Then reach out for help.  That’s it, take those 2 steps and you will be on your way!  

Gratitude & Grit – Our Core Values

KCI CrossFit was built to bring people together and provide a framework for them to create the happiest and healthiest version of themselves.  We collectively agree that we are striving to be the best version of ourselves and that we are committed to that pursuit today, next year, in 10 years and in 60 years.  We welcome newcomers into our community and treat them like family.   As a community of like-minded individuals, it became apparent that a common set of values and norms were needed.  A compass to help guide us.  A road-map to follow.


Gratitude & Grit Core Values

Let’s use an analogy to understand why the Core Values are important and how they affect our overall health and fitness “journey” to creating the happiest and healthiest versions of ourselves.  

To create the healthiest and happiest versions of ourselves we need a vehicle to take us on the “journey,” and we need a road to drive on.  

Our mentality of Gratitude & Grit is the vehicle.  And our habits/actions are the roadway.  Habits with our lifestyle, work, sleep, nutrition, and exercise are the major components that make up the roadway.  KCI CrossFit strives to provide the roadway, the path we can take to lead a healthy and happy life.  What we are also trying to provide is a tune-up, check-up, and upgrade to the vehicles we are driving.  A refining of our mindset; and an owner’s manual on how to drive the car.  

Gratitude & Happiness

Happiness isn’t a destination. It’s not around the corner or on the other side of a difficult situation.  That’s a hard truth we’ve had to realize.  We must chose to be happy, wherever we are because the journey never ends.  And this is the essence of gratitude.  Whether we’re talking about the “fitness journey” of losing weight or getting in shape, or the journey of life.  We won’t find lasting happiness at an arbitrary “end” destination.  

If I lose 20 pounds, I’ll be happy.  When I have 6-pack abs, I’ll be happy.  If I make $100k a year, I’ll be happy.  If I have 2 kids, I’ll be happy.  If I can buy a fancy car, I’ll be happy.  If I can retire and move to the beach, then I’ll be happy.  

These cultural norms are unfortunately not grounded in truth.  While achieving those goals may bring momentary excitement or happiness, it will be short lived.  Very soon, we will realign our goals and be striving towards the next “thing” without lasting happiness.  Always chasing a moving target!  

Conversely, cultivating gratitude yields happiness today and nurtures our capacity for happiness in the future.  Recognizing what’s already in our life that we can be grateful for.  Realizing the abundance that we already have and being thankful for it.  We are grateful for our spouses.  Our jobs.  Our safety.  Our freedom.  Our health.  And on!

Practicing Gratitude

Our attitudes are magnets.  Whatever we put out, we will attract.  Whatever we are looking for, we will find.  If we look for positivity, we will see it all around.  And if we see more positive in our lives, we will be generally happier.  And thus helping us achieve our primary goal:  creating the happiest and healthiest version of ourselves.  This is the core importance of gratitude in our lives.

What does Gratitude look like?  What are some of the actions of this mentality?  Well, here’s a few off the top of my head:

Gratitude means smiling.  Looking people in the eyes.  Active Listening.  High fives.  Being on time.  Using manners..  Encouraging words.  Lending a hand.  Working hard.  Never quitting.  Making sacrifices.  Saying “Thank You”.  Volunteering.  Just to name a few!

So, all that to say, gratitude is immensely important in our lives, and it’s importance translates to working out, our fitness goals, and overall health.  Gratitude is a mindset, and it’s also an action.  We live out our gratitude mindset through our daily actions.

Now, Grit.  Like Gratitude, Grit is a mindset that must be developed, and it’s also an action.  Developing grit doesn’t happen by chance.  It happens by doing; by taking action.  

What is Grit?

Grit is “getting knocked off the horse and getting back up.”  Grit is the willingness to try new things.  Grit is living outside your comfort zone.  Grit is building discipline.  Grit is accepting that failure is part of the process.  Grit is never quitting.  Grit is being resourceful.  Grit is making hard decisions.  Grit is making sacrifices.  Having grit means living with integrity.  Living with grit means having persistence when things get hard.  Having grit also means we don’t make excuses.  We could go on!

Grit in the gym means all of those things!  Results don’t just happen, and there aren’t shortcuts.  Hard work, persistence, integrity, and failure are all necessary parts of the process – whether you want to lose weight, gain muscle, or build confidence.  You see, to change our bodies we must push outside of our comfort zone mentally and physically.  We must make sacrifices.  We must find a way when the way forward is unclear!  Developing and practicing grit is at the core!

Cultivating Gratitude & Grit  @ KCI

KCI CrossFit is a place to cultivate grit.  We require hard work and persistence.  We are putting daily disciplines into practice.  We are parents, business owners, employees and we are making sacrifices to achieve goals in all areas of our life.  KCI CrossFit is a training ground to apply grit into all other areas of our lives.  Working out is hard.  CrossFit is hard.  We learn the basics, practice them and become better!  And therefore, cultivating grit helps us become the healthiest and happiest version of ourselves.  

Bringing Gratitude and Grit together is our recipe for success.  As a fitness community, we rally around a common goal and come together.  We encourage and challenge each other.  We have high expectations and hold each other accountable.  We celebrate successes and stick together when things get hard.  We are a family!  

What is CrossFit all about anyway? I’m glad you asked!

At surface level, CrossFit is confusing.  Will I get injured?  Do I have to be fit like the people I see on TV?  Can I lose 10 pounds in 2 weeks?  What’s the deal with all the weightlifting?  

If we can slow down and look at the roots of CrossFit and understand it, maybe CrossFit will make more sense.  Then we should be able to understand our own fitness goals, and see how CrossFit might actually be the tool we need to use.  Let’s first, 1) Take a look at CrossFit for what it is.  And then, 2) Let’s stand on common  ground as to why the majority of people do CrossFit.  . 

By definition, CrossFit is: Constantly varied, functional movements, performed at high intensity.  It’s aim is to increase work capacity over broad time and modal domains.  Here are two great articles describing these concepts in detail by CrossFit founder, Greg Glassman.  What is Fitness and CrossFit Foundations

What does all that mean, really?  It means that the goal of a CrossFit training program is to be able to do a multitude of activities, for different amounts of time, regardless of your age.  A CrossFit training program combines a variety of functional movement patterns, performing them at high intensity, to achieve the goal stated above.  Sounds pretty straightforward, right?  

You see, CrossFit differs from other fitness programs.  CrossFit doesn’t tout that you can “burn 500 calories” per workout, or “shed 2% body fat in 2 days” or really any other silly gimmick.  You won’t hear that, because those aren’t the goals of CrossFit (remember: increase work capacity over broad time and modal domains).  Sure you’ll burn calories.  And probably shed body fat too.  But in CrossFit, the program is much more focused on the long term, rather than short term goals.  

Have you ever thought about being active in a fitness routine for the rest of your life?  Or have you thought to yourself, “I need to start working out so I can lose 10 pounds”  But then what?  What happens when you lose the 10 pounds?  Do you stop working out?  Are you “fit” then?  Quit your gym membership because you’ve arrived at perfection?  Hopefully not.  See, CrossFit comes at the whole “fitness” thing from a different angle.  And it’s really hard to wrap your head around it.  A fitness routine for the rest of my life?  Yes, that’s exactly what I mean.  Being “fit” for the rest of your life sounds crazy, but should it be?  

There are a few things you will do for the rest of your life with regularity.  And each of those things will affect the quality and duration of the rest of your life.  Eat, sleep, interact with people, and exercise.  How you eat on a regular basis will affect your entire life.  The quality and amount of sleep will affect your entire life.  The quality of your relationships will affect the quality and duration of your life.  And your relative activity level (aka fitness) will affect the quality and duration of your life.  Mull that over for a little bit.  It’s all true, and there is research to back it up.  That’s why we strive to control those components – so we can have some control over our lives. 

So that brings us to the second point from earlier.  Why do most people do CrossFit then?  

To…..Get in shape?  Lose weight?  Get stronger? Do a pull up?  Really, at the core of these so-called “goals” are a couple components  that CrossFit athletes really understand.

Common CrossFit Myths Debunked

People do CrossFit to look better naked.  You can laugh, [and I did too when I wrote it]  But that’s because it’s true.  I don’t care how old you are, you want to like who you see in the mirror.  It’s true.  Call it vanity, but I’d bet that every time you look in the mirror you are analyzing, to some degree, how good you look.  So, dare to say, that’s part of our human nature.  We want to look good naked.  (aka.. get in shape, lose 10 pounds, tone muscles, get stronger, bulk up, or whatever else you want)

Secondly people do CrossFit for General Physical Preparedness.  Specifically, that means that people want to be prepared or capable to do a wide variety of things.  Play with your kids.  Participate in a sport.  Do well in your job.  Go on an adventure.  All of these require some amount of physical fitness, regardless of your age!  The guy that is bed-ridden by morbid obesity can’t do these things.  And that’s why people love CrossFit.  It helps you be prepared to do stuff!  


So there you have it.  CrossFit is a training program that can be done for life, to prepare you for life, and will help you look good along the way!

CrossFit Etiquette

Getting started in CrossFit is hard.  New exercises, new words, new people.  Then throw in loud music and a coach telling you what to do and you probably feel like your head is spinning.  Am I right?  

Well, your coaches try to make it as easy as possible to get started but sometimes it just takes some time to get used to all the new stuff.  Below you’ll find a list of common CrossFit Gym etiquette tips so you can feel a little more comfortable on how to navigate the gym and the unspoken expectations of your coaches.  

Take a look below and try to absorb the 31 most common gym etiquette tips! 


  1. Arrive early for class. Please don’t be late.  

  2. Don’t drop a barbell while unloading it

  3. Wipe down equipment after using

  4. Put your equipment away

  5. Pay attention when coach is talking

  6. Don’t have a conversation mid-workout

  7. Introduce yourself to newcomers

  8. In raining/snowing conditions – bring your CrossFit shoes to the gym

  9. Chalk belongs in the bucket or on your hands – not the floor

  10. Don’t walk in front of someone while they’re lifting

  11. Be considerate of others’ space

  12. Try to avoid “ghost-riding” the bar

  13. Don’t let the handle fly off the rower

  14. If you put chalk on equipment for a workout, take it off afterwards

  15. Take the chalk off your barbell

  16. Platforms aren’t for WOD’s.  Lifting only

  17. Don’t spit on the floor

  18. Please recycle

  19. Encourage other athletes

  20. Be accountable. Don’t cheat on reps, finish the workout you started.

  21. Be coachable. Learn how to respond to verbal and visual cues to enhance your experience and performance

  22. Encourage each other (yes, it’s in here twice)

  23. Walk into the gym with a positive attitude.

  24. Be grateful

  25. Pick up after your kids, or help them pick up their things

  26. Do your part to keep the bathroom clean

  27. Give high-fives to each other after class

  28. Kids are kids, but please make sure they behave

  29. Don’t be late for class (yes, it’s in here twice)

  30. Remove the J-hooks while doing wall balls

  31. Minimize distractions – cell phone, etc